Vaporware is a term used to describe software or technology that has been announced or rumored, but which does not actually exist, or which skeptics doubt could deliver what is promised even if it existed. My cooking has been something like vaporware;
rumored to exist but with few eye - or taste bud - witnesses.
These doubts are perhaps what prompted me to accept a challenge to participate in a game of Iron Chef with some friends in Brooklyn. A few weeks ago I was asked to be a judge in the first battle - Battle Shrimp - and a fun time was had by all. When asked to participate more directly as a competitor I figured it was time lift the veil and put myself to the test. My partner in this battle was Cybele, a writer, and kitchen wizard who I once represented in a real estate transaction. Our competitors were Sherri and Becky, winners of Battle Shrimp. The preselected theme of this battle was Cheddar cheese (not ideal for someone lactose intolerant like me, but no one promised war would be easy). Since the battle takes place in an apartment with only one kitchen both teams cannot cook simultaneously. Our competitors spent one hour of their two hour time limit prepping and planning. My team followed but used our entire two hour allotment to prep, cook, and serve our dishes. Once we finished serving and cleaning, the second team used their final hour to complete and serve their dishes. Like the television show, dishes are judged on presentation, originality, and taste with a maximum score of 20 points per dish. The non-cooking team takes notes on the comments made by the judges, but cannot comment or judge.
Each team had the option of preparing three or four dishes, we chose to make three. There is a budget though its probably more of a guideline than an absolute limitation. After sharing ideas Cybele and I realized our dishes would have an international flare so we made "internationalism" our theme.
Our first dish was Käsespätzle with Buttermilk-dressed Salad - what I describe as a German take on mac and cheese (and a new favorite of mine):

Our second dish was a Cheddar Apple "Danish" with Powdered Confectioners Sugar (though more like a desert, cooking logistics led us to serve this second, a decision which baffled the judges but which they told us also worked to our favor - more on that in a bit)(btw, this photo does the dish no justice):

Our final dish was Papas Rellenas with a Black Bean Salsa and Cheddar Jalapeño Sauce. The papas were filled with a Panchetta and Shitake mushroom. The judges told us that ending with this dish served us well (with all modesty I must report that this dish was judged the day's best):

Despite the success of our dishes, we lost to Becky and Sherri by one tenth of a point!! The closest battle in Iron Chef Brooklyn history (and hard to imagine how it could ever be closer). Truthfully, as the photos that follow will attest, Cybele and I were surprised to have mounted such a close challenge. Becky and Sherri are no joke!
Their first dish was a New York State Cheddar-Bacon-Chive Soufflé - that's right, a soufflé!!!

Their second dish, a Welsh Rarebit made with Irish Cheddar and Stout. I didn't know what a Rarebit was but it was good!

Third was Grafton Cheddar Truffled Cheeseburgers on Brioche with Green-Chile Mac and Cheese. Are you getting the picture yet? Sherri and Becky's dishes were mutli-faceted, well thought out, and looked and tasted great.

Finally, for desert, they served Carmar Cheddar Profiteroles served with an Apple Cider Reduction.

Despite all the hard work, it was a fun day for everyone. Great food, plenty of drink, and the judge's contemporaneous comments, read after the battle is finished, provide loads of laughs. Since Cybele and I lost we'll be judges in the third battle, date and secret ingredient to be determined. Until then I think I'll be taking a hiatus from Cheddar - I've had my quota for 2008.