Cell Division + 1

RIP. Though referred in the media as a "two headed boy", these boys - given the single name "Kiron" by their parents - are in fact Siamese Twins. For such a strange sight, this is a remarkably peaceful photo.

All Election All The Time

• Check on your voting registration status here.
  
  
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• Right wing blogs are convinced Joe Biden embarrassed himself in this interview. Some argue Biden is a gaffe prone fool hardly more qualified than Palin to be Vice President. I think he showed remarkable restraint in the face of blatant gotcha journalism.
  
  
  
  
  
• Self hating, all of them
  
  
• This kid cracks me up:
  
  
  
  
  

Main Street & God's Country

The right deserves the backlash it's receiving for trying to claim the mantle of real America; of decency, honor, and patriotism. As if party affiliation and zip code are reliable indicators of one's values or character. This type of demagoguery has been a productive election season tool for the right for many decades but times have changed and it's clear the returns are diminishing. The Daily show exploits the BS of it all in this clip about Main Street, Wasila, Alaska.

It Has Begun

This is a screen shot from inside the game "Burnout Paradise." If you play games like these, you'll notice plenty of sponsored ads from snack and drink companies in the form of billboards, vending machines, stadium signs, etc. Contemporaneous real time advertising, however, is a whole new ball game (possible only when your console is connected to the internet - which for most people is always). When reading about this a couple of years ago the idea was to advertise new and upcoming movies, music, and games. There was also talk about location specific advertising; perhaps a timely billboard ad from your local Dominos Pizza franchise, for example. Considering the fact that adults, young and not so young, make up such a large part of the gaming community, I guess political ads are a logical extension of the idea though it's hard to imagine anybody other than Barack having the cash for such niche advertising.

I'm Stunned

As much as I've rejected the right's flimsy attempts to link Obama to domestic terrorism, I have to admit, this link to the Weather Underground is hard to ignore.

Puns, I Like Them

This porta potty in midtown caught my eye - perhaps it jogged my thoughts on our economy. In any event, I thought the name of the company was brilliant. Only so many (tasteful) ways to make a company in the poo business stand out.

A Few Things

It's been a while so here goes:

• Did you know that the economic crisis is the fault of Niggers and Spics (capitalized out of respect)? Me neither. Sure, we all know these groups are often the root of problems that face America, whether it be overly exposed underwear or the loss of gardening jobs for White men, but in matters involving Wall Street, it's an American tradition to blame the Jews. Nonetheless several prominent voices are now telling us that a substantial portion of the blame for our current economic malaise can in fact, be laid on the backs, ashy or wet - take your preference - of the Niggers and Spics. They call it the diversity recession and instead placing blame on (a) the wall street geniuses who got richer than most of us can even imagine pedaling spectacularly risky financial products such as credit debt-swaps and derivatives, (b) the wall street financed lobbying firms that convinced (bribed?) ratings agencies and Fannie and Freddie to lower their risk criteria, or (c) simple old fashioned greed by an industry where folks named Leon and Jose have enough power to misplace your mail but not much more than that, instead of all that, our economy is imploding because the government made banks start loaning to Niggers and Spics. I love when complicated things are simplified for me. Speaking of simple, did you know?:
  

  ... whites (non-minorities) received 72.5% of subprime mortgages. Blacks got 16.2% of subprime mortgages, which isn’t all that different from the 12.4% of the general population that blacks comprise. The Hispanics about ... 6.2% of subprime mortgages, significantly less than their 14.8% of the general population

  I suspect the liberal media for these unhelpful facts.

• Bloomberg wants to do an end run around the term limits law by having the city council revoke the voter mandated law. Lot's of big players in the New York power scene are all for it: we're doomed without his vast financial expertise, say the the Wall Street titans who got us into this mess ...

• This article attempts to justify the practice of churches blessing pets but I still think it's stupid. I'd like to bring my Xbox 360 in for a blessing, as I've discussed in the past, the shit's got the devil in it.
  
  
• I just lost my fantasy football game by .03 points. I'm bringing my laptop to church dammit.
  
  
• Some say Track Palin, the recently deployed to Iraq son of Sarah, chose the Army when faced with jail time for a drug offense. I don't know if this is true, but I wanted to experience the fun of saying misleading shit to taint the character of a political candidate. Here's a picture of Sarah "Barracuda" Palin with her other son, Branch. I feel bad for the Palin kids not being exploited by their mom in this election, they must feel so unloved.
  
  

Bible Spice

Just Say No, Seriously

Amy Winehouse, like a fine wine rotting corpse, aged four years

Embrace It Obama!

It's Not Lying, It's Fine Print

This product doesn't quite measure up to its advertising:

Modern Art Blows

This is an actual police sketch of a suspect in a kidnapping. The absurdity of this sketch overshadows some other crazy facts about this case. Namely, the 300 pound victim who said he was kidnapped by a 5' 5" assailant.

Don't Be So Gullible

This may look like your run of the mill, politician with kid photo-op, but I know a terrorist kid hug when I see one. After gaining his trust, Obama schooled him the art of the terrorist fist bump. Young man, when you see a brother on the street, give him the fist bump, praise Allah, and say down with whitey!

As Always, Dead On

I'm Qualified, Trust Me

In the early days of my temp career, the types of projects I worked on did not require that I interview. A resume was often sufficient to convey my qualifications for the typically mundane work being offered.

Modest though I am, I think it was pretty self evident that I could, oh, say, READ.

Over time, more scrutiny was applied; some jobs required phone interviews, some involved brief face to face interviews. At this point in my career, I tend to apply for projects that require a degree of experience and interviewing with 2-3 people is common. The "no-interview" jobs are out still out there, I've fortunately moved past them. I don't blame companies for wanting to know more about me, my qualifications, my demeanor and personality, how I present myself, and so on. On the one hand, I'm only a temp, fireable at will, given limited access to the firm's property and information - a tiny investment in the big scheme of things, but in these companies defense, an un-vetted temp attorney such as myself could wind up being a drain on time and resources and heaven forbid I abscond with company paper clips and post it notes.

If it's prudent to perform due diligence before hiring a meager temp employee such as myself, don't WE THE PEOPLE have the right to ask a few questions of our vice presidential candidates??? Even the semi-literate Bush and his secretive Vice President answered a few questions when they ran for office. The media isn't fair, the McCain camp explains (over and over). Deal with it and prove your critics wrong.

I'm not worried though, eventually, spontaneous sentences will have to be formed ...

My Empire

Brilliant

The common household outlet made 50% better.

Life Is Short, Have An Affair

I saw a commercial for Ashley Madison in the wee hours one night and thought maybe I misinterpreted the service. It appeared to be offering married men a discreet dating service. As you can tell by their tag line above, that's exactly what they meant. For those interested in learning more but who don't want to leave evidence of visiting the site on their computer, click on the screen capture below. Not that I'm encouraging anything.

Politicians Say The Darndest Things

Here is a video of the Rove comments (and others) as presented on the Daily Show. Chuckles galore.

All Rove Needed Was A Good Editor

A month ago while speculating about who Obama might choose as his running mate, Karl Rove offered the following prophetic words on what Obama's selection of Governor Tim Kaine would mean. As we all know Obama chose Biden but Rove's work should not go to waste. Let's see what happens when we substitute McCain for Obama, Palin for Warner, she for he, and Alaska for Virginia. OMG, I can't believe it but I agree 100% with Karl Rove. Never thought I'd say that (to make this easier I've edited Rove's statement for you):

"With all due respect, again, to Governor KainePalin, [s]he's been a governor for three years. [s]He's been able, but undistinguished. I don't think people could really name a big, important thing that [s]he's done. [s]He was mayor of the 10[0]5th-largest city in America. And, again, with all due respect to Richmond, VirginiaWasilla, Alaska, it's smaller than Chula Vista, California, Aurora, Colorado, Mesa or Gilbert, Arizona, North Las Vegas, or Henderson, Nevada. It's not a big town. If he were to pick Governor KainePalin, it would be an intensely political choice, where he's said, 'You know what? I'm really not first and foremost concerned with, is this person capable of being president of the United States? What I'm concerned about is, can [s]he bring me the electoral votes of the state of Virginia, the 13 electoral votes in Virginiathe easily manipulated?'"

Well said Rovie.

Thanks, Andrew

I'm too lazy to live blog Palin's speech so here's Andrew Sullivan's take (start at the bottom):

11.10 pm. Reality television has become our politics.

11.06 pm. Both Huckabee and Palin have used the t-word. Of course, they are not criminally liable, as Bush is.

11.05 pm. Every time the camera pans to McCain's mother, she seems mortified. I don't really blame her. Can you imagine what she was thinking as a tiny special needs baby is passed from person to person for the cable news.

11.03 pm. However admirable it is to be a mayor, is it really necessary to drip contempt for people who work as community organizers? It seems to me that Palin doesn't quite have the stature to be putting down someone who has won millions of people's votes. This is a much more partisan speech than I was expecting.

11.00 pm Styrofoam pillars; and self-designed seals. And her lip curls.

10.58 pm. Now it's about big government - which Republicans have exploded in size. But no one can notice the actual record of the GOP in growing government and increasing debt. That would be too much accountability.

10.56 pm. Obama wants to reduce American power and prevent energy production. The mockery of Obama from Palin is striking. I don't recall anyone mocking McCain at the DNC.

10.53 pm. Drill, baby, drill! I may be just revealing that I'm out of touch, but I don't see why laying pipelines is now a core rallying cry of American conservatism.

10.50 pm. I have to say that the affect is of someone running for high school president.

10.49 pm. Piper is poking Trig in the eye!

10.48 pm. Ethics reform is her first policy proposal.

10.47 pm. She has this weird tick of scrunching up her face to make a forceful point. Kinda Tracy Flicky.

10.44 pm. Palin echoes Giuliani's attack on "cosmopolitan" elites. All the buzzwords are there. Elite. Elite. Elite. This is a culture war speech - and she is becoming a symbol of red America. This is what they have to do top win: divide and polarize again. We are half way through, by the way, and we have not heard a single policy proposal. But we have heard contempt for someone who works as a community organizer in the South Side of Chicago.

10.40 pm. We've just seen a picture of a seven year old cradling and stroking the hair of a Down Syndrome infant. This, apparently, is relevant to deciding who should be the next vice-president of the United States.

10.39 pm. I'm just slack-jawed that, so far, the entire speech has been basically about her family. She seems as if she just won a reality show and is introducing her folks. And they have passed the baby now to four different people - including another child. Slack-jawed.

The View ...

Is not bad. From Sunset Park, BK

Photo by Barry Yanowitz

Less Fire! Less Fire!

The Jerk chicken was hot, but not too hot. It was only when I tried the scotch bonnet hot sauce that I realized I was out of my league. Fortunately, a savvy water vendor had set up next to the Jerk Chicken vendor and two bottles of water later my heart rate had returned to normal.

My burnt taste buds notwithstanding, the West Indian Day Parade was a lot of fun this year. Great weather, great food, and a lot of booty shakin. The only thing missing was beer. I remember when I first moved to NY and lived on the parade route, there was nothing better than a cold Red Stripe with my curry goat. These days booze is verboten from parades. Oh well.

It wasn't all fun and games; I was working. Most of you don't know this but among my many talents, I'm also a filmmaker. For all my loyal fans, I present below the world premiere of Less Fire! Less Fire!

Sexy And Deadly

The young women of the Israeli Army as photographed by Rachel Papo.

I LOL'D

Over at Fark today folks brought out their best examples of FAIL: